In 2008 I began a year long quest toward metal stability and emotional health via the ubiquitous avenue of fanfiction. After watching an entire season of One Tree Hill, and falling in love with the pairing of Brooke Davis and Lucas Scott, I more emotionally invested in that one season than I'd been in any tv show for a long, long time. I saw in those two a facet of romance and depth and fantasy that I instantly connected with. It was hard not to become obsessed with their characters.
When it was blatantly obvious that they would not be the It couple for the show, I went in search of FanFiction, a hoped for source of fictional storylines that would assuage my bitter disappointment in their separation. I was lucky enough to find FanFiction.net, and the wonderful community of readers and writers for OTH. I started, and posted, three different plots, and posted a fourth entry, intended to be a one shot.
Through my stories for OTH, I slowly worked myself back to a safe place emotionally, pouring all my emotional turmoil and strife from reality into a fictional world that was handed to me on a silver platter. Think about it: the hardest part to any great story is developing the backstory. It's creating characters with depth and realistic attributes, bit players that add humor, a history that one can build from. With FanFiction, you're handed a fully crafted set of characters and back story, with full freedom to tweak as you saw fit, adjust as needed, and spin into a future that would please you as both an author and a reader. Perfection.
As my stability solidified itself, I found my desire to write waning. At some point, I'd completely stepped away from the world of FanFiction, and tentatively dipped my toes into the fantastical world of FictionPress. Since then, I've branched out, created my own website (obviously) and have begun to seriously consider penning a novel for publication.
However, none of that truly matters when you consider my FanFiction profile. I developed fans, loyal readers who faithfully read my updates and commented and provided feedback. By not completing my stories, I was disrespecting the time and effort they'd already put into my creative therapy sessions. By leaving plotlines hanging and characters dangling in the wind, I was being rude.
I spent some time today on my FanFiction profile, updating it and making some tweaks. I reread my summaries, and dear lord they were horrific. I've since gone back and adjusted them, but still. Three years of those dreadful summaries up for all to see...I shudder at the thought. I'm going to finish my stories there, and maybe when I'm done I'll tweak the summaries again, who knows. Either way, I've vowed to finish the stories this year, and only post once I have all the chapters done. It's just kinder, and easier that way. Too many updates of "I'm so sorry this is so late!" and "I promise, the next installment's just around the corner." Bah.
I'm actively searching for a beta now, and I hope to finish the stories by mid summer. I'd like to focus on some other aspects of my writing, but not finishing these would be a serious thorn in my side, I think. So...onward. To finishing projects three years in the making, and upholding my end of the author/reader role.
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